It’s an inside job

Ever wondered how those (really annoying) super successful, super fit, super loved up, super happy peeps do it? You know the ones… always kicking professional milestones, travelling the world with bae (I ain’t talkin’ bout bacon and eggs) and enjoying a full social life – all while looking like a million bucks. Green juice in hand, of course.

I’ve often pondered their secret – the Wonder Women and Supermen of the world who seem to ‘effortlessly’ juggle it all…

Excuses – we’re all guilty, right?

When it comes to setting life goals, I’ve fallen prey to the old ‘I’ll start tomorrow’ trap – a trap that can seem impossible to escape. Tomorrow somehow magically turns into next month, year or even worse – next lifetime.

I’ll watch countless Gary Vaynerchuk videos, unapologetically display vision boards throughout my apartment, and will confidently talk up my grandiose plans to strangers at a dinner party.

I’m kinda like my own hype man… on repeat… only problem is the main act is yet to take the stage!

To understand the psychology behind daydreaming about our goals – and actually taking action, I had a chat to Registered Psychologist Elizabeth Neal. With years of experience helping people to navigate challenges and unleash their inner Wonder Woman (or Superman), here’s what Elizabeth shared:

Persistence paves the way

Persistence is paramount to staying on track with your goals. People who are persistent in working towards goals and personal accomplishments tend to be driven not only in their work, but are also usually driven in their personal lives as well – in sport or leisure activities.

This is somewhat embedded within a ‘persistent personality’ type, and people with this trait tend to have little difficulty staying on track with their goals.

Give yourself mad props

Make note of your successes – no matter how small. Recall these experiences of self-mastery when confronted with challenges that may otherwise lead to self-doubt.

Memories of personal accomplishments increase our self-efficacy beliefs. Higher self-efficacy means we are more likely to have a ‘can-do’ mindset, when approaching new or challenging situations or tasks. Previous experiences of overcoming challenges help boost the confidence we have in our abilities, capacities and worth.

Squat for booty AND supernatural stress management

The fitter we are, the better handle we have on our stress response. When we are stressed, our adrenal glands release surges of adrenalin and cortisol. High levels of cortisol and adrenalin compromise our ability to think clearly, communicate affectively and exercise good judgement.

Fitness hormones, like endorphins, have a mediating effect on the stress response. People who exercise regularly are physiologically in a better position to deal with stress, than people who do not exercise regularly.

Work-life balance for the WW win

As a relationship psychologist, I see that it’s the people in our personal lives that are sources of both our greatest happiness and our greatest stress.

Ensuring the people we care most about feel validated and acknowledged requires careful work-life balance. When these relationships are free from niggling conflict, people have higher confidence, self-efficacy, motivation and increased general life satisfaction.

What would WW do? Focus on the solution

When feeling stuck or stagnant, try not to focus so much on what’s lead you to this place, or the details of the problem. Instead, shift your mindset to specific ways of facilitating viable, sustainable changes.

Have a system in place so you are actively working on something everyday.

Be persistent but flexible, and prepared to adapt to changes and shifts in trends as they arise. Determine what’s no longer working and make necessary adjustments.

Continuously update your skills and knowledge, so that you maintain a position at the forefront of your desired destination.

If all else fails, just do you boo!

Figure out what’s meaningful to you, and the rest will fall into place.